From the album Come To God
This is about the specific betrayal of being told your pain is invented. The song starts with prayer because the narrator needs a higher power to make this not real, not because she's seeking comfort. She offers her partner an out (say it was fake, say you're kidding) while simultaneously performing invulnerability (nothing can touch me, I brush it off) that the repetition itself proves is a lie.
Tell me you're fakin' it, tell me it's not real / Tell me you're fakin' it, it's not a big deal
She's not asking him to apologize. She's begging him to say the hurtful thing didn't happen, which is worse. The switch from 'it's not real' to 'it's not a big deal' shows her already negotiating herself down, willing to accept that it happened as long as he minimizes it.
I brush it off, I brush it off like / Nothing can touch me, nothing can move me
The word 'like' makes this aspirational, not actual. She's describing the performance she wishes she could give, not the one she's managing. Claiming invulnerability while literally being sick with grief is the song's central collapse.
I know you don't really mean to be like this / Don't promise anything, don't try to hide it
She excuses him and then immediately tells him not to excuse himself. The whiplash shows she knows he'll use her own forgiveness against her. 'Don't try to hide it' suggests the cruelty is constant enough that concealment would be exhausting for both of them.
Hit me when I'm down
This could be accusation or instruction, and the repetition doesn't clarify which. The ambiguity makes it unbearable. She might be naming the pattern of abuse or she might be the one directing him where to aim, making herself complicit in her own harm [UNVERIFIED: though it could also just be a statement of fact without agency either way].
The song never says what he did. That void at the center is the point. What matters is that she's already negotiating, already performing strength, already forgiving him before he's even pretended to be sorry. The repetition makes the lyrics feel like compulsion, like she's trying to talk herself into a version of events she can survive.