From the album U
This is about trying so hard to become what someone wants that you stop knowing if you even want them back. underscores is changing everything about herself while begging for validation that never comes, and by the bridge she realizes she's chasing someone she might not even like once she gets them. The whole song runs on anxious performativity, the kind where you rebuild yourself for an audience of one and forget to check if they're watching.
Livi thinks that I'm in over my head / Dropping old interests, changin' my hair
Her friends are watching her transform in real time and they're worried. The casual tone makes it worse because she's treating major identity shifts like outfit changes, all for someone who hasn't confirmed they care.
Is this doing anything for you, baby? / You gotta tell me you want it
She's performing without feedback, like doing standup to a silent room. The desperation in 'you gotta' reveals she already knows the answer is probably no, but needs to hear yes badly enough to keep asking.
Gemma says I'm thinkin' too big / 'We are what we eat, babe, we're destined for this'
Gemma is the hype friend feeding her delusions with fortune cookie logic. The Miranda gym guy reference is so specific it sounds like they've workshopped this fantasy together, which makes it sadder.
I get what I want and then find out right after I get it, I don't even want it
The whole pursuit collapses the second she names her pattern. She's not actually into this person, she's into the chase and the validation. Six in the morning means they've been at this all night and she still can't shake them or the truth.
You gotta tell me you want it, tell me you want it
She's still saying the words but the meaning has inverted. It sounds like a threat now, or a joke she's in on. The laugh in the interlude confirms she knows how unhinged this all is.
The song ends still begging for confirmation but now it sounds hollow, like she's saying it out of habit. What started as desperate hope turns into self-awareness mid-performance, but she can't stop performing. That's the trap.